New Years Threesome

This video hit me like a freight train, if I'm going to be honest. I'm a 19 year old male, and obviously, I'm a virgin. And actually, this was recommended to me when I first opened youtube... immediately after I closed the hub for the second time in less than 8 hours. And before I was on the hub, I was trying to find legitimate hook up sights for free. I feel like I needed to see this. I feel like I need help or someone to talk to. I can relate to a lot of your story. I know the girl. Her and I have known each other for almost 5 years. We met in our freshman year. I'm sure most guys know that feeling when you see a pretty girl at a store or something and you daydream a life with her. We all get that. I got that when I saw this girl, but the extremity of it was more than I've ever felt before. I, like you, am very shy. I never went out to talk to girls, even if I had a huge crush on them. But this was different. I took a week getting the courage to even speak to her. I eventually did, kept it casual. We spent that first week just talking, getting to know each other. Exactly a week after we first started talking, my dreams came true. She confessed that she was growing feelings for me. I knew she would say yes, so I asked her to be my girlfriend. She did. I didn't know how I managed, but I had the sweetest, cutest, funniest girl ever and she was my girlfriend. Little did I know what I signed up for, however. Due to personal and unrelated issues, we had a long off and on relationship, but I grew too attached to her and didn't want to give up on our relationship. She was also the first girl I held hands with, first girl I kissed, and my first real love. Then COVID hit on March in our 10th grade year, and we went online. We couldn't see each other in person until she moved onto her dorm in college, so we went from March 2020 to January 2023 without seeing each other. Getting to see her in January was one of the happiest days of my life. We spent like 4 hours together and we did get intimate, however I did not lose my virginity. I didn't get to see her again until August but now I have seen her 3 times in the last month. One time we did get very intimate but once again, we did not have sex (For personal reasons, we couldn't). Part of me starts to lose my common sense when I get turned on which is what causes me to go on the hub or want to have a one-time hookup but I need to stop. A hookup, like you said, won't solve anything. At the end of the day, I want to lose my virginity to someone special. Someone important. Someone that I love. Her. Thank you for this video. This was eye opening. I'm going to stop going on the hub, delete my accounts on hook up sites, and try to stop worrying about it. It'll happen someday... I hope.